Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The World Cup of Beer: Have a Taste Now, They Won't Be Around Long (Part 1)

By Kirsten Schlewitz, Dan Wiersema, and Jesse Nechodom

Alrighty then! The Free Beer Movement's 2010 World Cup of Beer is underway! Now, unfortunately, we've got no time for elaborate opening ceremonies. Our South African counterpart is already underway and you need beers to drink alongside the teams.

Now if you're going to be able to slam a cold one for all 32 participating teams we need to get the early exiters out of the way first. So if you were to drink a beer with each team you'd better get your mitts on one before they're backing up the luggage for the long flight home.That's where we're going to kick-off our coverage

Category One: "Have A Taste Now, They Won't Be Around Long"

Japan

Hitachino Nest Espresso (Kiuchi Brewery)

This is an expensive pour, but absolutely worth it. Beautiful, near-black appearance with a big foamy tan head and lots of lace clinging to the glass. Aroma of coffee, chocolate, and red fruits. Tastes of chocolate, vanilla, cherries, and, of course, espresso. Absolutely delicious—and with all the espresso, you’ll feel no guilt drinking this for Japan v Cameroon on Monday.

- KS


Paraguay

Brahma (Brahma Brewery)

Brahma (even though from Brazil, but now brewed in Paraguay as well) is the best beer out of Paraguay and represents the country well. Brahma is a plain old lager with no outstanding flavors or features, but it goes down pretty smooth and gets the jobs of refreshment and inebriation done quite effectively. This is the perfect beer for Paraguay which is a rather unremarkable country geographically, hence the lack of special flavors or features. The lager style is refreshing on a hot day, of which there are plenty in Paraguay, and fits with the workmanlike philosophy of the Albirroja (Paraguay's national soccer team).

- JN

South Africa

Castle Lager

It's a sad state of affairs that the Bafana Bafana will probably be the first host nations to fail to make it to the knockout stages. That being said the hosts are putting one hell of a party, vuvuzelas and all.

To celebrate crack open the un-official local beer of the World Cup, Castle Lager. Budweiser might be forced down your throats inside the stadium, but outside it's all Castle. While this beer is the run-of-the-mill macro brew lager it does have two distinct advantages: 1) Castle's parent company SABMillerCoorsWhatever has developed a pull-top design ("Full Aperture" they call it) that turns an ordinary can into an EXTRAORDINARY pint (clearly beating out the Miller Lite "Vortex" bottle in speeding-beer-to-your-mouth-technology) and 2) there's nothing like downing a Castle lager though a vuvuzela beer bong!

-DW

Denmark

Beer Geek Breakfast Weasel (Mikkeller)

I typically try to have a variety of styles in the beers I recommend, but this group is all dark, mostly because I think those are better morning brews. And there’s no better breakfast beer than this—it wins for the name alone. You could just have the regular Beer Geek Breakfast Espresso Stout, but you really should go all the way and drink this one, whose espresso is made from the droppings of weasel-like civetcats, who only eat the freshest, ripest coffee beans. I promise, I’m not s***ing you. A 7% ABV oatmeal breakfast stout made from rodent droppings: there is nothing better you could drink for the early match against the Netherlands on Monday.

- KS


North Korea


Taedonggang Beer (Taedonggang Beer Factory)

How can one say no to a beer called the "the Pride of Pyongyang"? Well in North Korea you legally cannot so... bottoms up!

North Korean leader Kim Jong-il, said to have a fondness for fine wines and brandy, has taken a personal interest in the brewery.


"Watching good quality beer coming out in an uninterrupted flow for a long while, he noted with great pleasure that it has now become possible to supply more fresh beer to people in all seasons," North Korea's state news agency, KCNA, said after he visited the brewery in 2002.

Which is kind or ironic that people would enjoy drinking beer when each year the nation has to import millions of tonnes of food to prevent starvation so I'm sure what they're really dying for (literally) is a good beer. Wheat for bread? Nah.... put it in the beer!


The North Korean dictator wanted a world-class brewery (nukes, etc... always trying to keep up with the Jones's) and bought the for-sale Usher Brewery in England, disassembled it, and brought piece by piece to North Korea should tell you something about the quality of the beer, which has been called inconsistent at best.

Think that story is weird enough check out their two and a half minute advert (we guess you can get that sort of length on TV in between military parades and Kim Jong Il's "Happy Happy Fun Time Execution Hour":



- DW

Switzerland

Bier Paul 02 (Schwarzbier)

Well the upset of the tournament so far, but we've got a feeling that the clockmakers are still heading home.

Go ahead and serve this dark beer (Schwartz means black) in a dimpled mug, just for funsies. It pours deep red-brown with a foamy beige head. Take a whiff and you’ll smell cola, brown sugar and chocolate. Chocolate and toasted malts are mostly what you’ll taste. It’s just 5% ABV, so drink it all through the match on Wednesday.

- KS



South Korea

S (Hite Brand)

Despite their strong showing against Greece in their opening game the South is following the North back home. Although hopefully not on the same flight... that might be a bit awkward. We were going to tap our Senior South Korean Correspondent for this review, but... we didn't.

Instead you're getting our "sexy" pick, Hite's "S" billed as "beer with dietary fiber" which we guess is a bit like the carb craze that hit the U.S. Really all the writing about this beer is a laugh riot.

Try these on for size:

*Dietary fiber is so popular these days it has been dubbed the 6th nutrient. Dietary fiber is known to enhance intestine movement to help people keep in shape

* Simply holding "S" makes you a style leader

*With a label design that reflects new trends, a refreshing emerald-colored bottle, a beautiful body-shaped logo type, and a simple twist cap, S is an icon for the new style leader pioneering a youthful style that is ahead of the times.

You can't argue with those selling points. "S" me!

- DW

Slovenia

Laško Termalni Desert (Pivovarna Laško)

This one is going down like their National Team against the US!

Slovenia brews just one dark beer, but fortunately it is their best beer. Unfortunately, unless you’re in Italy, Sweden, or Denmark (or Slovenia, I suppose) you won’t find it on the shelf. Still, try to grab this dunkler bock for your World Cup collection. It’s a deep brown with a toasty malt smell. Tastes of chocolate, coffee, and dark bread.

- KS





Greece

Hillas (Thrace Brewery)

You'd think that a drink that once was brewed as an offering to the gods would have a better showing, but Greece has traditionally had few local beers to sample from. Most of the Greek market has been dominated by imports from other European nations.

We were able to track down a brew that tries to highlight the godly connection and according to reviews isn't half bad.

Too bad this team and your chance at drinking it during the tournament is disappearing faster than polytheism.

Bada bing!

- DW

Australia

Coopers Best Extra Stout (Coopers Brewery)

Everyone who believes that Fosters really is “Australian for Beer” needs to sample one of these bottles. Pours pitch-black with a tan head. You could just sit and smell this one for hours, with its nutty malt and deep coffee aromas, but that would probably defeat the purpose. This stout is not overly sweet, with a lot of bitter coffee tastes, but a nice vanilla finish. This will make a nice midday beer for Sunday.

- KS



New Zealand

Emerson's Pilsner (Emerson's Brewing Company)

Certainly not the world-beaters that the rugby team is expect a quick exit from the tournament by the "All Whites." Before they do make sure to take a pull off of one of the many quality offerings from Emerson's.

Both the pilsner and the porter are great as Emerson's has been bringing home national and international brewing awards since their opening in 1993. Like many of their craft brew competitors their delicious hops are growing right in Kiwi country.

-DW

Algeria

Let’s face it—Algeria have the early morning match on Sunday, and the match that most of our readers are invested in occurs later in the day on Saturday. Everyone’s going to either be hungover or still drunk. Either way, it’s just might be time to take a cue from this Muslim nation and lay off the alcohol for a few hours.

Or grab a Bloody Mary to balance out your electrolytes before you start with the beer again for the next match. That’s cool too.

- KS

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2 comments:

  1. no beer bottle better fits your hand then brahma

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete

"Anyone who tells me soccer is boring, I'm going to punch them in the face."
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