War of Independence 2010 Art Gallery

With under two weeks before the epic battle against England we thought it was appropriate to re-visit some "art" that we created many moons ago to commemorate this upcoming game.

For those students of history the United States has a knack for wiping the floor with the Brits. For soccer it was 1950 (and the the Nike uniforms), but we're going a bit further back for our inspiration.

Enjoy as we create the "War of Independence 2010".

"Tim Howard Denies Wayne Rooney"

"Yankee Doodle Landy and Co. Take Out David Beckham"

"Bradley Crosses the Deleware"

"Bradley and Donovan Accept Fabio Capello's Surrender (with John Terry) at Saratoga"

Those Bastards at The Guardian!

No, wait! Not our friends at "The Shin Guardian". Whew... dodged a bullet there. Almost lost an ally. And in this cut-throat world of American soccer media you need those. Like how we just made ourselves apart of the legitimate American soccer media there. Probably didn't even notice. Snuck it right it there on ya. Now its been said. We're in.

Anyways... the "bastards" we're speaking of are the ones at the England's "The Guardian" newspaper. Why such anger at some stuffy old rag from across the pond, you ask?

Because they're filthy stealers!

First the go and steal "The Shin Guardian's" stuff!

TSG (left) and The Guardian (Right)

Then they came for us.

A few months back we put our super-sweet (note: not super-sweet) Photoshop skills to use and created a little bit of brilliance. This bad boy:

Yeah. Pretty awesome huh? We've got a whole lot more where that came from, too.

Well, The Guardian must have thought they were pretty awesome also and so they went ahead a COPIED the idea for some stupid series on England's injury problems.

Wanna see the proof?

The similarities are un-mistakable. What you don't see it?

War? Check. Beckham getting canned? Check. US on the attack (not pictured, but one could assume!)? Check.

Bastards! This means war, course!

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Yankee Doodle Landy and Our "Declaration of Soccer Independence"

Dateline: June 12th, 2010

Like it? Yeah? We made it. We're pretty awesome.

Channeling the spirit of Joe Gaetjens, American Soccer Freedom Fighter:

"When, in the course of World Cup events, it becomes necessary for one soccer nation to dissolve the playing bonds which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the Beautiful Game, the separate and equal station to which the laws of FIFA and of nature's God (Charlize Theron) entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of soccer pundits around the world requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all players are created equal, that they are endowed by Pele with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of more goals. That to secure these rights, soccer is instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of Bob Bradley. That whenever any form of soccer becomes destructive to these ends, it is the right of the USMNT to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new soccer, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form (other than England's 4-4-2), as to them shall seem most likely to effect their formation and width. Sunil Gulati, indeed, will dictate that soccer long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown that American soccer fans and media are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of Sepp Blatters and Jack Warners, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their national team duty, to throw off such soccer, and to provide new center-backs for their future goalkeeping. --Such has been the patient sufferance of these American soccer fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former systems of government. The history of the present English National Team and Premier League is a history of repeated injuries and hard tackles, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute tyranny over these USMNT and Major League Soccer. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a candid world."

Original Piece: "Yankee Doodle" by Archibald Willard (1836-1918)

This quote works, too:

"Today, we celebrate our independence day!" - President Thomas J. Whitmore (Bill Pullman in "Independence Day")