Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Be Good To Us "MLS on NBC", We've Been Hurt Before

Hey NBC... the FBM Graphic Department is for hire.
Well that certainly was nice of you, National Broadcasting Corporation. And unexpected we may add. We caught wind (more than a wind... perhaps gale-force the way the Inter-Net-Blogo-Sphere responded) that you showed a fancy little Major League Soccer teaser video during a pre-season throwball game on Sunday.

That's cool. Problem is we've been down this road before.

Picture this... a fancy network swoops in with a nice TV deal, some kind words about the growth of the league, and a flashy promo or two for their broadcasts. Sound familiar? Yeah... we've been here before. Twice.

Running the risk of sounding like a bad Lifetime made-for-television movie, American soccer fans have fallen in love, moved in with a network, only to be abused and keep coming back for more.

So forgive us if we're a bit hesitant when you show up at our doorstep promising that you're different from other networks that we've been with before. We're impressed with what you did with the National Hockey League and Versus (soon to be the NBC Sports Network)... a real "She's All That" job, but hockey's got Boston and Canada to help them out; a couple of markets that aren't looking too pretty for MLS right now.

All joking aside we just hope that you don't lose interest. We're really excited about this opportunity and we really do like you a lot. It's been a while since we've been treated so nicely.

You're even nice enough to give our friend U.S. Soccer a little taste as well. That's sweet of you. They've been having a rough go of late with their last network. I don't know if you heard and we don't like talking bad, but they we're kinda into little kids. Pretty embarrassing stuff.

We're fifteen going on sixteen and so we're at the age where it's time to stop fooling around. We're not looking for a fling here, but love. We don't want platitudes like a flashy graphics package or some primetime promos. That's a good start, but we want to see some commitment. Hire some nice men to keep us company during the broadcasts. Give us multiple camera angles... we've got a lot of good sides. And HD... we're not afraid of a close up.

So make good NBC. I know we're a bit inexperienced, but we're loyal. If you treat us good we'll get right back at ya.

If you screw us though..... oh man.... we'll go all "Basic Instinct" on you.

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"Anyone who tells me soccer is boring, I'm going to punch them in the face."
- Former Dallas Burn (aka FC Dallas) coach Dave Dir

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