Jurgen Gonna Love This...

The Jurgen Klinsmann-era begins today against Mexico.

What better way to ring in the occassion than with a classical-synth-techno-pop highlight reel of our new coach.

Here we go!

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Tuesday 10: Lines from Klinsmann's Pre-Game Pep Talk

Editor's Note: We continue a great new feature on the Free Beer Movement site. In collaboration with the quality soccer site, "The Other 87 Minutes" we present the "Tuesday XI" (and sometimes the "Tuesday Ten") a thoughtful list on a variety of topics in the world of soccer.

Make sure you head over to "The Other 87 Minutes" and check out all the... well... other great writing on their site. What do you think of the "Tuesday XI"? Let us know in the comments section!


Top 10 lines from Jurgen Klinsmann's pre-game pep talk. 

We hope we're not making this face Wednesday.

1. Remember, the most important thing is not whether you win or lose, it's whether you make me look good in my first game.

2. OK, so here's the gameplan. Give the ball to Clint and let him…wait, has anyone seen Clint?

3. I know it’s risky, going with an all-out-of-favor-with-their-clubs starting XI, but I’ve already put everyone’s CV’s on Craigslist already, so go get ‘em.

4. Now, the public is expecting a tactical masterstroke. Howard, you’re up top. Jurgen Klinsmann's Secret Identity

Klinsmann's Secret Identity

5. Yes, it really was all Jogi in Germany. No, that does not mean I will answer to Boo Boo.

6. Remember, our keys to the game: Never-say-dietude and stick-to-itiveness.

7. God I haven't done this in a while...[stretches]. Now, who are we playing?

8. Alright, we’re 2-0 down, but we have a long 45 minutes ahead of us…what? Yes I know it hasn’t started, but I was told it was the only way to motivate you, is it not?

9. Where did I leave that bottle of “Jurgen’s Secret Stuff”? They may take this game, but they'll never take...

They may take this game,
but they'll never take...

10. I don’t know what to say really. Three minutes to the biggest battle of our professional lives. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers, must remember that great moments are born of great opportunity; what we do in life echoes in eternity, and I think you’ll find it’s the exact same measurements as our gym back in Hickory. Heroes get remembered, but legends never die and ducks always, always fly together. Eye of the tiger, boys.


About "The Other 87 Minutes"

What is this new site we're exposing you too? We'll let them explain:

The Other 87 seeks to provide something that’s not instant analysis or eve of matchday previews. Think of us as the good bits of your favorite soccer coverage: the profiles that examine what makes a certain player tick, the historical background that sheds some light on how the sport has evolved to the present day, the silly features that are more than just tacking names on a list, but considering and explaining why each one deserves to be there.

O87 wants to be a home for soccer writing that makes you think, but that also treats the game as just that, a game. The greatest game, the one we obsess over and fixate on, to the point where we can’t read that gas costs 3.43 a gallon without thinking of Ajax’s 1995 Champions League winning team. But a game nonetheless.

“When you play a match, it is statistically proven that players actually have the ball three minutes on average. The best players – the Zidanes, Ronaldinhos, Gerrards – will have the ball maybe four minutes. Lesser players – defenders – probably two minutes. So, the most important thing is: what do you do those 87 minutes when you do not have the ball…. That is what determines whether you’re a good player or not.” –Johann Cruyff

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Klinsmann Announces USMNT Roster for Mexico (August 10th)

Photo Credit: Getty Images

The first roster of the Jurgen Klinsmann era is out! The 23-man squad will face Mexico on August 10th at Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia.

Here you go:

U.S. ROSTER BY POSITION
GOALKEEPERS (2): Bill Hamid (D.C.United), Tim Howard (Everton)

DEFENDERS (8): Carlos Bocanegra (Saint-Etienne), Edgar Castillo (Club America), Timmy Chandler (FC Nürnberg), Steve Cherundolo (Hannover 96), Clarence Goodson (Brondby), Michael Orozco Fiscal (San Luis), Heath Pearce (Chivas USA), Tim Ream (New York Red Bulls)

MIDFIELDERS (7): Kyle Beckerman (Real Salt Lake), Michael Bradley (Borussia Mönchengladbach), Ricardo Clark (Eintracht Frankfurt), Maurice Edu (Rangers), Jermaine Jones (Schalke 04), Brek Shea (FC Dallas), José Torres (Pachuca)

FORWARDS (5): Freddy Adu (Benfica), Juan Agudelo (New York Red Bulls), DaMarcus Beasley (Puebla), Edson Buddle (FC Ingolstadt), Landon Donovan (Los Angeles Galaxy)


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Happy International IPA Day!

Our ALL-TIME favorite IPA, Bell's Brewery Two-Hearted
(Comstock, MI)

We talk a lot about the message on the Free Beer Movement website, "American soccer", but sometimes we forget that the medium is just as important to the cause. Today is one of several "beer holidays" celebrated in the United States called "International IPA Day".


What is IPA Day you ask?

International IPA Day is a grassroots movement to unite the voices of craft beer enthusiasts, bloggers, and brewers worldwide through social media. On Thursday August 4th, craft beer drinkers across the social sphere and across the globe will raise pints in a collective toast to one of craft beer’s most iconic styles: the India Pale Ale. This celebrated style represents the pinnacle of brewing innovation with its broad spectrum of diverse brands, subcategories, and regional flavor variations – making it the perfect style to galvanize craft beer’s social voice.

Started by  two beer writers Ashley V Routson and Ryan A Ross this is the first annual celebration of the event.


What do you need to do?


1. Track down your favorite IPA’s, ones you’ve been meaning to try, and ones you’ve never heard of; share them with friends and share your thoughts with the world.


2. Feel free to Tweet pictures of your favorite IPAs to us on Twitter or post them on our Facebook page. 



3. OR just tell us your favorite IPA in the comments section below!


4. Most of all... enjoy in drinking some of your favorite beers with your favorite people AND if you have a change do it over soccer!


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VIDEO - Teal Bunbury Uses Bobbleheads to Show How He Scored Against New England

Sporting KC striker Teal Bunbury has struggled to find playing time and the net of late, but he made it count last week when he scored a dramatic late-game equalizer against New England. His 89th minute tally ensured a share of the points and kept Kansas City's 13-game unbeaten run intact.

Bunbury, always the ham, celebrated by running to the corner flag and playing "bobblehead" for the fans.

That inspired Sporting KC to put together this video with "Boon Boo Ree" breaking down his goal with bobbledheads laying around the team's office.

Sporting should used these over and over for various game re-caps. Props are awesome. We can't tell you how many times we've explained the offside rule using salt and pepper shakers, ketchup and mustard bottles, and the like.

Watch:



Only thing Sporting should be ashamed of is that Bunbury used a Chicago Cubs Ryne Sandberg bobble in the formation because if there's one thing KC doesn't like it's anything from the Windy City. The owner of that probably got fired after this.

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The Tuesday XI: Remaking "Victory" Edition

Editor's Note: We continue a great new feature on the Free Beer Movement site. In collaboration with the quality soccer site, "The Other 87 Minutes" we present the "Tuesday XI" (and sometimes the "Tuesday Ten") a thoughtful list on a variety of topics in the world of soccer.

Make sure you head over to "The Other 87 Minutes" and check out all the... well... other great writing on their site. What do you think of the "Tuesday XI"? Let us know in the comments section!

Yesterday over at our site we argued in favor of a remake of Victory, the 1981 soccer film featuring a team of Allied POWs playing a match against the German national team. Today, we’re remaking the team, which in the original featured everyone from Pelé and Bobby Moore to Co Prins and Hallvar Thorensen.

There are a couple of guidelines we decided to follow:

1. We’re casting actors in both the Michael Caine and Sylvester Stallone roles. That does not mean Vinnie Jones.

2. We’re going to try to stick to some semblance of rules with regards to historical accuracy. In Victory, Stallone’s character flew with the Royal Canadian Air Force, while Pele’s Luis Fernadez was from Trinidad and Tobago, as Brazil hadn’t yet entered the war. That means no Spanish, no Brazilians, no Portuguese, no Argentineans, and obviously no Germans or Italians are going to play on our Allied team. Don’t fret too much about missing out on the prides of Barcelona and Real Madrid: Messi would have needed some Super Soldier Serum to enlist anyway, and Cristiano Ronaldo would be the least convincing POW ever.

3. Like the original, we’re going to branch out into the Allied nations and look for more than just English players. We're also going to cast a mixture of current and recently retired footballers. Unlike the original, we are going to make use of some of our Eastern Europeans.

4. We’re lining our squad up in a 2-3-2-3 metodo formation, which appears to be what Caine’s Capt. Colby has drawn on their chalkboard during training.

GK – Mark Wahlberg – Forget his soccer bashing past; where would the sport be in this country if we never converted anyone who ever had a negative thought about the game?

Wahlberg’s perfect for this role as Hatch, the ignorant American who has to learn to be a goalkeeper so he can lead the team on their escape. Unlike Stallone, whose best roles were always understated, Wahlberg has the ability to be bombastic and disagreeable without being annoying, to push up against the predominantly British power structure that is the prisoner’s world in the camp without becoming grating.

Looks like a POW to me.

FB – Nemanja Vidic – In the original, Colby requests a contingent of Eastern European players be placed on his team for humanitarian reasons: he’s trying to get them out of their labor camps, trying to save their lives. They sit on the bench during the final match against the Nazis, but none of those players end up actually playing, the implication being they’re too malnourished and worn down by their time in the camps to contribute.

The game today though is more multi-cultural, and Vidic a famous enough face to warrant inclusion. Besides, it’s fitting to include some Eastern Europeans on our squad, as the true story Victory is ever-so-loosely based on what happened to the Ukrainian team of Dynamo Kyiv.

FB – Sol Campbell – We get a (recently retired, whether he admits it or not) classic English center-half to play our other defender. Unfortunately for him Sol, like Pelé before him, will be the only black man in all of World War II.

Close enough.

LM – Ewan McGregor – The funny thing about Michael Caine in the original Victory is that every shot, and there are only a few, in which he actually kicks a ball seems to indicate that he’s terrible at it. He and Sylvester Stallone both had “soccer doubles,” but if you watch the final game, it’s clear Caine’s got a lot more work.

So, with that no talent necessary disclaimer, we’ll pick McGregor to play Capt. John Colby, formerly of West Ham. Ewan’s old enough now to play an authority figure but looks young enough that his playing career could still have been going on when the war ended, and most of all he brings that same sense of mischief Caine demonstrates in everything from Victory to The Dark Knight to The Muppet Christmas Carol.

All footballers-turned-actors should hope for such a role.

CM – Vinnie Jones – He doesn’t get to be one of the leads, but for the work he’s done trying to get the project off the ground, and because he’s always good for a few visual gags.

RM – David Beckham – Alright, so we’re bowing to the inevitable. Alright, so Beckham would be only slightly more convincing as a POW than Ronaldo.

LIF – Zinedine Zidane – Slips nicely into the role of all-time great that Pele filled in the last film. Zidane would be the Allies’ Jimmy Chitwood — (mostly) silent and lethal, lurking forever in the background exuding competence. No matter the shot, he’ll make it.

What's his motivation for juggling?

RIF – Clint Dempsey – Yes, we’re straying from the formula of the original, which had Stallone as the only American. There’s good reason for that formula: the movie’s supposedly set in 1942, before American combat operations truly stepped up in that sphere — Hatch’s back story is that he was flying with the Royal Canadian Air Force. We’re upping the number in the remake, because in 2011 there are American soccer players with the worldwide reputations to merit inclusion, and perhaps serve as additional box office draws. Dempsey wins out because of his popularity and his playing style, which makes him a good representative.

The only problem: Dempsey’s a terrible actor. He’s not even convincing when he plays himself in his Modelo commercials, and he has approximately 2 seconds of screen time in those.

LW – Marc Overmars – An option on the wing who also adds the Netherlands into our Allied Nations quota. We really wanted to go with Bergkamp — we do love him around here — but Overmars is four years younger and a natural left winger.

CF – Miroslav Klose – Wait, hear us out on this one. Klose — Germany’s all-time leading World Cup goalscorer — has said he prefers to be thought of as European, not German or Polish. His wife is Polish, his mother Polish, and he speaks Polish in his home. There’s no reason he can’t play a Pole in the film, one of the Eastern European prisoners brought in from their camps as part of Colby’s effort to lessen their burden of suffering. Plus, it'd be something of a nice gesture to the Germans.

RW – Brian Laudrup – We wanted at least one other Allied nation to be represented. What, did you think we were going to hire Nicklas Bendtner?

So here's the squad:

About "The Other 87 Minutes"

What is this new site we're exposing you too? We'll let them explain:

The Other 87 seeks to provide something that’s not instant analysis or eve of matchday previews. Think of us as the good bits of your favorite soccer coverage: the profiles that examine what makes a certain player tick, the historical background that sheds some light on how the sport has evolved to the present day, the silly features that are more than just tacking names on a list, but considering and explaining why each one deserves to be there.

O87 wants to be a home for soccer writing that makes you think, but that also treats the game as just that, a game. The greatest game, the one we obsess over and fixate on, to the point where we can’t read that gas costs 3.43 a gallon without thinking of Ajax’s 1995 Champions League winning team. But a game nonetheless.

“When you play a match, it is statistically proven that players actually have the ball three minutes on average. The best players – the Zidanes, Ronaldinhos, Gerrards – will have the ball maybe four minutes. Lesser players – defenders – probably two minutes. So, the most important thing is: what do you do those 87 minutes when you do not have the ball…. That is what determines whether you’re a good player or not.” –Johann Cruyff

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Better Know a Supporters Group - Gorilla Football Collective

We continue our comprehensive coverage of American soccer culture with our series "Better Know a Supporters Group," just like Steven Colbert's "Better Know a District" from "The Colbert Report". 

Our goal: to feature each of the MLS teams' supporters groups. We've sent e-mails to each and every SG in Major League Soccer and soon you'll be able to check all what each is all about and what awesomeness they have to contribute to our growing American soccer world.

When we devised this idea a while back it was cool to be able to see what each supporter group is about, but in light of the terrible, one-sided, anti-American, condescending profile of Philadelphia's Sons of Ben SG by the British GQ (not even going to link to it to give them the site hits) we think its all the more important to give supporters groups in Major League Soccer the proper exposure and voice they deserve.

Today we feature one of Seattle Sounders very visible and very vocal supporters groups, Gorilla Football Collective.

As told to the Free Beer Movement, by Melina Young, one of the group's "captains".

The Basics

Photo Credit: Greg Mauch

SG Name: Gorilla Football Collective

MLS Club: Seattle Sounders

Stadium: Century Link Field (Previously Qwest Field)

Year SG Founded: 2009 (same as the Sounders)

Section Name (if other than SG name): We sit primarily in section 120 in the stadium, but there are members that are scattered throughout the stadium.

Any other SGs apart of your section? We sit next to the Emerald City Supporters (ECS) and some of them overflow into 120.

Location of SG in Stadium (section #, side, direction): South (Brougham) End

The Meaty Questions

What are the origins of your groups’ name?


The history of Gorilla FC goes something like this… Gorilla FC ‘s core group are a bunch of
activists that put together a soccer team way back when. With all the excitement of the Seattle
Sounders FC, we decided to get it back together and be more or less an open loose group then
we were before! We are still holding on to some of our roots though and will support our local
communities through various benefits.

Favorite chants/songs?


There are so many chants and songs that go on throughout every game, it is hard to pick a favorite. We love to chant along with the other supporter groups to try and create the best possible environment at the game. One chant that almost everyone participates in (throughout the whole stadium) is a “call and answer” style chant, where our side of the stadium yells “Seattle” and the rest of the stadium answers with “Sounders” it is really cool to experience.


Why is being in the supporters section the “best seat in the house”?


Well, ours really are great because we start in the first row behind the goal, where the players warm up, and walk to the locker rooms. A lot of our players do high-fives, handshakes or autographs after the game (sometimes give away their jerseys or other stuff to loyal fans) so it is a great place. It is also great to attend the game with a supporters club and sit in the same section, because you get to sit with 50-100 of your closest friends every time you go to the game. Usually, no matter who you are sitting by, they are just as enthusiastic about the game (and hanging out with you) as you are, so it is always a lot of fun.

Brag. What makes your SG one of the best supporters groups in MLS?


Gorilla is very inclusive in our membership. We state proudly on our website that: “We accept all those who are willing to chant with us, drink with us, and Support with us no matter your race, religion, political view, sexual orientation or gender. Gorilla FC helps support the Seattle Sounders FC as well as our local community.” This helps set a standard for our group. We also have a code of conduct to ensure that everyone has fun at the games.
Gorilla is also very involved in charity work and put on several events each year (with and without the Sounders club) to raise money. We raised more than $20,000 in one day for Doctors Without Borders after the Haiti disaster.

Greatest game(s) in team history?

I am sure everyone who is asked will have a different response, but one really great moment was when the Sounders won the US Open Cup for the second year in a row, in front of a home crowd, last year (2010). Every game is great in its own way.

Predictions for this season?

I predict that the Sounders will win a third US Open Cup this year, and make a great run for the MLS Cup too.

Why Major League Soccer? Why American soccer?


Soccer is a great game. It is fun to play and exciting to watch. The Sounders players are really great guys who are really involved in, and love, the community here in Seattle. This is a sport that is still in its early years, and it is a great time to get involved and support different clubs. Soccer is the world’s game for a reason; we want it to be big in America too. The Sounders care about getting input and support from the fans, which is why they have an Alliance Council and allow the fans to vote. This is pretty unique in American sports, and we are all just excited to be a part of it.

For more information and/or to join Gorilla FC, check out their website.


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FBM Drinkin' Songs: The Official Soundtrack of the Free Beer Movement

Beer. It's meant for drinking.

And preferably with some soccer in front of you. Whether you're in the bar or at the tailgate we at the Free Beer Movement have put together a hard drinkin' soundtrack to keep motivated while you're slamming brews and introducing soccer to newbies (not that you needed that much of a push).

These are just a few of the more awesomely epic drinkin' songs we came up, but we're sure there are loads more. What songs should we get for "FBM Drinkin' Songs: Volume Two"?

"Beer" by People Under the Stars

Best Lines:

"Dude you don't like beer?

Get the fuck out of here!

Really, man, I think you should go home."

"Pretty Good at Drinkin' Beer" by Billy Currington

Best Lines:
"A go getter maybe I'm not
I'm not known for doin' a lot
But I do my best work when the weather's hot
I'm pretty good at drinkin' beer"



"Another Drinking Song" by Mighty Mighty Boss Tones

Best Lines:
"Gonna dive into a jive
I've dove into before
Gonna haunt a haunt I've haunted
Like a million times or more
A familiar joint
Where getting drunk's the only point
To frequent this place
With any frequency at all
Countin' on a remedy
I've counted on before
Goin' with a cure that's never failed me
What you call the disease,
I call the remedy
What you're callin' the cause,
I call the cure"

Ludacris "Chicken and Beer"

Ludacris' third studio album makes this list not because of any specific song, but the entire thing. Beer? Chicken? The greatest lyricist in the hip hop world?

Check. Double check. Triple check.



"Beer Season" by Kevin Fowler

Best Lines:
"Well its beer season in my neck of the woods
Well they go down easy and they sure taste good
Beer season everybody's here
There ain't no limit and its open all year"



"Beer" by Reel Big Fish

Best lines:
"And if you're drinkin' well, you know
That you're my friend and I say
I think I'll have myself a beer"



"Rain is a Good Thing" by Luke Bryan

Because we can't expect that all FBM moments come through beer. Use the heavy stuff!

Best Lines:
"Rain makes corn, corn makes whiskey
Whiskey makes my baby feel a little frisky"



"I Like Beer" by Tom T. Hall

Best lines:
"I like beer. it makes me a jolly good fellow
I like beer. it helps me unwind and sometimes it makes me feel mellow (makes him feel mellow)
Whiskey's too rough, champagne costs too much, and vodka puts my mouth in gear
Aw, this little refrain should help me explain as a matter of fact I love beer"



"Gin and Juice" by Snoop Dogg

Best lines (good FBM sharing going on here):
"Now that I got me some Seagram's gin
Everybody got they cups, but they ain't chipped in
Now this type of shit happens all the time
You got to get yours but fool I gotta get mine"



"Roll Out The Barrel" by Andrews Sisters

The greatest song in the history of beer. Played during the seventh inning stretch of EVER Milwaukee Brewers game (and sung religiously by Danny Beerseed of course when he makes it back home to Wisconsin for games). Obviously, if you've got plenty of soccer newbies... you might want to consider rolling out the keg.

Best lines:
"Roll out the barrel, we'll have a barrel of fun
Roll out the barrel, we've got the blues on the run
Zing boom tararrel, ring out a song of good cheer
Now's the time to roll the barrel, for the gang's all here"



These are just a few of the more awesomely epic drinkin' songs we came up, but we're sure there are loads more. What songs should we get for "FBM Drinkin' Songs: Volume Two"?




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The Story of the Little Red Fan

Once upon a time there was an American soccer fan who lived in a big American city. He was friends with a Manchester United supporter, a Bayern Munich fan, and a guy with a Brazil jersey.

One day he read that that a new Major League Soccer team was starting in his city. MLS guy had an idea. He, so desperately wanting to watch live, local soccer, would buy season tickets to this new team.

Knowing his friends were fans of soccer he decided to invite them along to the game. "Who will come to support this new, local team?" he asked with a hopeful heart.

"Not I," said the Manchester United supporter. "MLS doesn't have any big-name players."

"Not I," said the Bayern Munich fan. "Their stadiums aren't as full of those of Europe. How can you play in a football stadium?"

"Not I," said the guy in the Brazil jersey. "American soccer is boring."

"Suit yourself," MLS man said. For the price of a month of the add-on Fox Soccer, GolTV, and Fox Soccer Plus cable package he saw live, local soccer and was given a season-ticket holder scarf.

----------------------------------------------------------------

MLS man attended, and attended regularly the local matches and grew to love his team. Soon the well-supported team was competitive in the Conference. He decided to try again with his invitation.

"Who will come and support this local, live team with me?" he asked.

"Not I," said the Manchester United supporter. "The quality of play is below that of the English Premier League."

"Not I," said the Bayern Munich fan. "The supporters groups here are a bunch of posers."

"Not I," said the guy in the Brazil jersey. "I only watch games during the World Cup."

"Suit yourself," MLS man said. He bought his local team's jersey and invited other non-soccer fan friends to join him at games with offers of free beer.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Soon the local team was to play a high-profile team from another continent. Being a season ticket holder MLS guy had the opportunity to buy additional tickets. His soccer friends, unlike before, were very interested in going to this game and paid three times as much to watch the continental team's second team easily defeat the MLS side.

"See how much better this continental team is?" taunted the Manchester United supporter.

"You're wasting your time with the local team," chimed in the Bayern Munich fan.

"Thanks for the free beer," said the guy in the Brazil jersey. 

"Just wait and see," said the MLS man as the local club took in a big pay day and used it to fund their developmental academy.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Year in and year out the MLS man bought season tickets watching the American game improve. Luring expensive foreign players, developing local talent through their academies, and becoming the home to solid talent from Central and South America. The local side even was able to build a soccer specific stadium. With this new home, certainly his soccer-loving friends would appreciate how far the local game had come.

"It will never be Old Trafford," said the Manchester United supporter who had only seen it on television.

"The stadium isn't located near my house," complained the Bayern Munich fan.

"Check out the new Brazil jersey I got for the game!" exclaimed the guy in the new Brazil jersey.

"Suit yourself," MLS man said. His daughter had become quite attached to the local team and now he had a constant companion.

------------------------------------------------------------------

The American game grew and grew and so did the local team. They won several MLS Cups and consistently played in the CONCACAF Champions League, reaching the finals twice and winning it once. The American league was now one of the highest regarded in the region. The stadiums were packed, the supporters loud and passionate. Fans from all around the area flocked to watch high-quality, competitive soccer. The MLS man was very pleased with how well he supported the growth of the local, live game.

His friends were surprised with how far the American game had come. Last time several high-profile continental teams played in the U.S. they were soundly beat and their managers had fielded their first-teams in hopes of keeping pace with the American sides.

By now MLS man's friends were ready to come around to American soccer. They grew weary of the over-paid players in Europe, the early morning matches, the silly transfer season, the lack of a real connection....

MLS man was getting prepared for his team's appearance in the MLS Cup Final. This time his soccer-loving friends wanted to join him at the game and had bought jerseys and scarves to show their support.

"Got room for one more at the game this weekend?" asked the new supporter in the local team's colors.

"Beers are on me this time," said the new fan with the local team's scarf.

"Look what I just bought for the game!" exclaimed the guy in the local jersey.

Sorry dudes. I'm off to catch the game with my kid and 50,000 of my closest friends. I left you all a six-pack in the fridge. Enjoy the game on TV.

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Tuesday XI: Real Canadian Heroes

Editor's Note: We continue a great new feature on the Free Beer Movement site. In collaboration with the quality soccer site, "The Other 87 Minutes" we present the "Tuesday XI" (and sometimes the "Tuesday Ten") a thoughtful list on a variety of topics in the world of soccer.

Make sure you head over to "The Other 87 Minutes" and check out all the... well... other great writing on their site. What do you think of the "Tuesday XI"? Let us know in the comments section!

We had started playing around with this lineup a few weeks ago, shortly after we did the Real American Heroes. But given last weekend's introduction of Toronto FC in Kansas City (the video of which, sadly, seems to have been removed, but the picture above should give you a good idea) we figured it was the perfect time to trot it out.

Wayne Gretzky – GK — Everyone knows the goalie is the most important member of a team in hockey, so why wouldn’t we get the greatest hockey player ever to be our goalie?

Bob McKenzie – LB — The Canadian Fabio da Silva.

Dudley Do-Right – CB — Something of an old-fashioned, lumbering center half, his occasional antics are forgiven when he saves the day at the last possible second.

Johnny Canuck – CB — Fearless pilot/secret agent and tireless defender of Canada. His basic competence makes him the ideal partner for Do-Right.

Doug McKenzie – RB — The Canadian John O’Shea.

Tommy Douglas – LM — “Who?” you no doubt say (Unless you really are Canadian, in which case, our apologies for the entire list). To which we reply, “We have no idea, but he’s apparently the Greatest Canadian, according to the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation."

No, just kidding. Douglas, a former premier of Saskatchewan, introduced single-payer health care to Canada. Given his history of expanding service to all Canadians, Douglas would make a perfect touchline hugging, cross-delivering wide midfielder.

The author and Trebek 15 seconds after he threatened to punch him.
He was kidding, we think.

Wolverine – CM — This punishing central midfielder has never missed a game for club or country, ever, since his debut as an 18-year-old in 1900.

Alex Trebek – CM — Possesses insightful passing, but is also surprisingly hardy in defense. Playmakers wary of his partner’s aggression may underestimate just how impressive the diminutive quiz show master is in the tackle. Believe me when I say that Mr. Trebek doesn’t take shit from anyone, especially when you refer to him as diminutive.

Scott Pilgrim – RM — Less of a support player than Douglas, Pilgrim can get lost in the game sometimes, but is a devastating attacker when he snaps back into focus.

Billy Bishop: Badass

Alexander Graham Bell – CAM — Has a knack for establishing connections with the rest of the team, and making the most of them. And yes, he was born in Scotland, but Canada claims him.

Billy Bishop – CF — Fact: All World War I flying aces were tremendous badasses. Air Marshal Bishop scored 72 kills in Europe, which makes him either third or fourth all-time World War I ace, depending on how much stake you put in Mick Mannock’s biographers. At any rate, for his agility, adaptability, ability in the air, and his tremendous shot, Bishop is our forward.

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The Other 87 seeks to provide something that’s not instant analysis or eve of matchday previews. Think of us as the good bits of your favorite soccer coverage: the profiles that examine what makes a certain player tick, the historical background that sheds some light on how the sport has evolved to the present day, the silly features that are more than just tacking names on a list, but considering and explaining why each one deserves to be there.

O87 wants to be a home for soccer writing that makes you think, but that also treats the game as just that, a game. The greatest game, the one we obsess over and fixate on, to the point where we can’t read that gas costs 3.43 a gallon without thinking of Ajax’s 1995 Champions League winning team. But a game nonetheless.

“When you play a match, it is statistically proven that players actually have the ball three minutes on average. The best players – the Zidanes, Ronaldinhos, Gerrards – will have the ball maybe four minutes. Lesser players – defenders – probably two minutes. So, the most important thing is: what do you do those 87 minutes when you do not have the ball…. That is what determines whether you’re a good player or not.” –Johann Cruyff

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